Maybe I

Who would’ve thought 21 would be the year that I start looking after my health?

It’s Rosie’s 21st birthday, and I think she had a great time. I got to see a few friends and coworkers as well, which is nice since I go back to school in a few days and I’ll miss them all terribly. Things went well, didn’t have to listen to that “I should’ve just gone to bed” song, though thank you, Ryan, for trying to reinforce my good habits.

I’ve been petsitting for two dogs, two cats, and a chameleon over the last five days or so, and although it’s a little annoying driving 15 minutes out of the way every day, I really don’t mind the responsibility. It’s helped motivate me to not drink too much during the night and wake up early in the mornings. I’m wayyy too much of a morning person, so seeing the beautiful skies at 8AM have been really inspiring and breathtaking.

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I’ve come across that conflicted feeling again of wanting to share these beautiful thoughtful moments with someone or if it’s just something I should cherish on my own. I will always cherish them, however I’m not sure why I’m starting to yearn to share such moments. I don’t know what I would expect anyone to say in response, and sometimes I don’t think there are words that could describe it. Are all people like this? Is there some random passion, random beauty, for everyone out there? Something that others just might not understand, so instead they yearn for some kind of mutual understanding? Maybe I should ask my friends, but I’m worried that a few of them will just say “fireball.”

Coming home hasn’t been exactly what I expected. I’ve been fighting off a cold most of the time so far, so I’m trying to make sure I get enough rest which is unusual enough in itself. I got to spend a lot of time with my sister while she was here, and I’m really happy about that. It almost felt like when we were still living together, before she even went to college. It was definitely tougher saying goodbye to her, but I’ll always put on that supportive face.

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The restaurant has been about the same, some people you love, some people you can’t stand. I think I’m falling into a rut with it honestly. I’ve always had these exciting yet dreadful thoughts of moving, and recently they haven’t seemed so bad. I will always be thankful for the time I’ve had in my hometown, but I think the universe is telling me that it’s okay to move on soon. Big things are happening for me, hidden somewhere in this cosmic energy, and I can’t wait to unleash it.

I did a chakra cleansing/activating meditation today, opening my crown and third eye chakras, which are supposed to influence intuition, so I’m listening to my intuition today; I forgot how much I enjoy eastern practices. Unfortunately, sometimes I think my intuition is tailored more to my desires and/or anxieties than to the universe. I’ve become to complacent, going by feel. In many cases, I admire that, but in certain cases, I need to remind myself to be rational.

(As I’m currently being tested)

Anyways, I just wanted to check in. My lofty thoughts are fading, though they’ve been abundant since I’ve been home. However, it’s late, and I have to be up early to take care of the animals. I’ll be back soon, I’m sure.

Love

 

 

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